CDM Archive

Discipleship Ministries of the PCA

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Small Groups – A Place to be Known

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Continuing from the last issue with the topic of small groups, I would like to review Lyman Coleman’s three-legged stool approach. A Christian group needs to involve:

1. Bible study, or more broadly worship. Some groups sing. Each group I work with allots a significant time for prayer. And the Bible should always be our reference point. 2. An opportunity to tell our stories. Everybody has a story to tell and almost everybody wants somebody to hear it. These stories are seen against the backdrop of Scripture, which gives us ongoing instruction for living and encouragement in our various relationships. 3. A task. We need to look beyond ourselves. That might involve inviting others to the group and/or taking on some sort of service project. Much of the mercy ministry effort in the church I work with flows from the small groups. It could also be that the task would be primary with time allotted for the other elements such as a choir, Session or Board of Deacons.

Small group suggests a level of understanding that grows as people come to know each other better. And that is a significant inhibitor. Many of us don’t want to be known. This makes us vulnerable. If they really know me will they still accept me? I ask myself that question. Whether you ask it or not, there’s a real possibility that it makes you cautious in relationships.

Yet we long for meaningful relationships. Many of us are lonely and feel somewhat isolated. But we fear what might be entailed in attempting to really connect with others. So we choose to remove ourselves, limiting relationships to those that are casual and consequently non-threatening.

To get close to someone suggests caring for that person. And caring can be both costly and scary. Often when there is a death we don’t know what to say to the one grieving so we avoid the issue by avoiding the person. When there is a serious illness the tendency is to refrain from any mention of it. We don’t want to say the wrong thing so we say nothing. When there is public sin there is a tendency to talk about the sinner but not to the sinner. Yet if it’s a friend isn’t there an obligation?

It might surprise you to know that many who practice such avoidance are the clergy – people we tend to think of as professionals in relationships and the practice of caring.

Friendships carry obligations. To avoid those obligations, we must avoid friendships.

Christians have experienced the love of God in Christ. That love should cause us to love others the way we have been loved. One forum for that is a group where people learn to look out for each other, challenge one another and pray with and for each other all the while reflecting on the message from the God who has brought us together.

Are you involved with a group of Christians who are stimulating your growth in grace? If not, why not?

Small Groups – A Program with Purpose

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bob.jpgAt the last PCA General Assembly I was amazed when some 150 people came to a seminar I led on small group ministry. (I had prepared for 25 thinking I might have 10.) Those who came represented a variety of situations. Some wanted to know how to start a small group ministry. Others wanted tips for enhancing already thriving ministries.

Small group ministry is not new-or even relatively new. I remember how many Christians viewed small groups with suspicion in the ’60s and ’70s. Today, if you don’t have such a ministry you’re out of step. It’s become a major component in discipleship efforts.

First century believers met regularly in homes. These were relatively small groups. The Methodists, who got their name because they had a method, met each week in groups. It was part of the method. One question they asked was, “how is it with your soul?” The Sunday school has, for the most part, been a small group ministry.

What churches presently call small groups are in place in part because our living situations have become so transient and relations so scattered that the need for connectedness is often acute. Small groups, in some measure, help plug that gap.

Last May, as the group I led was winding down for the summer, I asked them to talk about their reaction to our previous ten months of meetings. One couple said that this was the primary means by which they had gotten to know some people in the congregation. That’s not unusual.

But small group ministry is a program. Like any program it should be viewed as a means to an end. If you don’t have a clear idea what you want a program to accomplish its value ought to be seriously questioned. To put it another way: don’t have a small group ministry because you think everyone else has one.

My purpose in small group ministry is threefold. I obtained this outline from Lynn Coleman a number of years ago:

  1. Bible study: Actually I would broaden it to say “worship”. Each group needs to base their discussions on the Scripture. Further, I want each group at Covenant Church, where I work, to have a significant time of prayer. That is Covenant Church at prayer.
  2. The opportunity to tell your story: Everybody has a story to tell. Often those most reluctant to begin are ones who talk the longest. Over time those stories are seen in the light of the biblical message.
  3. Task: At Covenant we do much of our mercy ministry through our groups. We’ve often encouraged Lyman Coleman’s empty chair-praying that someone will fill that chair in the group.
  4. If you want to re-examine the purpose of your group ministry the three-legged stool is a good plan to start.

The Use of Knowledge

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There’s been a tacit assumption in our wing of the church that correctly understood, affirmed information will produce a corresponding change in a person’s life.

It’s possible to cling to that belief because there is such rampant biblical ignorance at every level in the church-from children to adults, from new believers to those with years in the faith, from occasional attendees to seminary students to church officers.

It is also true that in spite of the trouble we have communicating the Bible’s message, the easiest component to accomplish and the easiest to check is information.

In a variety of contexts we try to teach the Bible. But the problem doesn’t seem to get much better. It might help if we were to do more to determine just what people are learning. But that’s a partial answer at best.

We must challenge the assumptions. There’s a small minority of people who know a lot of what might be called Bible trivia, i.e., the name of Moses’ wife or even an outline of John’s gospel. But they haven’t gotten the Bible’s message. There’s another small group who are attracted to Christianity’s philosophical system. It hasn’t, however, had much impact on the way they live. It’s possible to know a lot about the Bible and still not know God

There’s a much larger group of Christians living with varying degrees of hypocrisy. We either ignore certain aspects of the biblical message, rationalize our disobedience or suffer from deep-seated feelings of guilt. We’ve heard the message but for one reason or another it hasn’t changed us.

Part of this might be the attitudes of the Christian culture. The people we associate with will significantly shape our thinking. On the one hand, those attitudes might reinforce biblical teaching or they could distort it.

Divorce has become commonplace. Getting a divorce is easier in spite of our efforts to strengthen marriages. To minister to those who have divorced means holding in tension the reality before us as well as God’s pronouncement. He hates divorce.

The myriad of individual decisions that lead to dissolving a marriage is at the heart of the breakdown of family life. Moving beyond divorce can sometimes take a lifetime for a couple and their children. While divorce is sometimes permissible according to biblical teaching and on occasion necessary, those ought to be the exceptions.

Christians might agonize over a divorce, wrestling with things like concern for the children as well as feelings of inadequacy and failure. They might raise questions about God’s love and grace. Such a rupture could stir guilt while at the same time virtually compelling self-justification.

Too often the fundamental teachings of Scripture are either ignored or conveniently forgotten as the drama plays out and its ramifications ripple through the months and years. It would seem that far too many people abandon the church (or the church abandons them) in their crisis.

A head full of biblical data and doctrinal formulations mean little if they are not used by God to influence our behavior when confronted with obvious life-altering decisions. However, if the information isn’t there, it can’t be used.

Keep that in mind when children learn the Catechism in Pioneer Clubs (as happens at our church). Keep it in mind when biblical accounts are studied in Sunday school. When Bible passages are memorized, remind yourself that this is the sword of the Spirit. But just as the Spirit uses people to explain the Word, he uses people to apply it.

Be a Kingdom Disciple

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Be a Kingdom disciple? Isn’t it hard enough just being an “ordinary” disciple of Jesus?

According to Matthew 28, discipleship involves:

1. Baptizing. We might call it “introducing people to Jesus.” One reason Jesus might have talked about baptism is this: baptism is a rite of the church. Making disciples refers to the work of the church. That means it is part of your work, part of the educational ministry of your church. How would you evaluate your outward focus?

2. Teaching. At creation God gave what is called the “cultural mandate” (Genesis 1:28-30). That has never been abrogated. And the implications are broad. That’s where Kingdom discipleship comes in. As followers of the King we are to take the values of the Kingdom wherever we go. What are those values? They are derived directly and indirectly from Scripture.

At the church where I serve, middle- and high-schoolers are getting another introduction to the Westminster Shorter Catechism. That is combined with a study of Nancy Pearcey’s Total Truth for high-schoolers. Part of the challenge is offering a Christian foundation that will prepare them for the secular university and, beyond that, living in an alien society.

Ask yourself: what does it mean for your children and young people to take the values of the Kingdom to their school? To have them reflected in their relationships? The same kind of questions should be raised with adults. Your next question is: how do we effectively communicate Kingdom values in our churches?

3. Teaching – to the end that we will obey. Christianity is much more than a philosophical system. It’s a way of life centered on a relationship to the person of Jesus. Using words from the Old Testament, Jesus summarized the law this way: love God and love your neighbor. Paul simply says, “love your neighbor.” And John reminds us that if we can’t love those we can see, how can we love God who we can’t see?

It doesn’t take much thought to realize that his command is impossible. Individually most of us are miserable failures. Consequently as instructors, we can easily come off as hypocritical. So what makes it worth the effort? Jesus tells us that He has the power. And His promise to fumbling, stumbling people like us is, “I will be with you always.” And His presence is life changing.

With that confidence we can take up our Lord’s challenge to be disciples and to make disciples. We can even work at becoming Kingdom disciples because He has the power and He is with us. Does that give you another level of confidence or what?

Something Different

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Your evaluation of previous years’ efforts may prompt you to make some adjustments in your summer activities.

Sunday Evening

For the past two years the church I serve (Covenant in Fayetteville, GA) has offered prepared meals during June and July. This combined with a special program each week attracted about half of our Sunday morning congregation. Some features included: young musician’s night, which has brought grandparents, uncles, aunts, etc.; missionaries known to the church; an old fashioned hymn sing, as well as musical groups and speakers outside our church family.

The result:

1) It fostered relationships within the church (we have two morning services).

2) It generated ongoing enthusiasm for other activities during what has usually been a down time.

3) Visitors from our morning services were invited as our special guests and many came. It helped some determine that they wanted to make the church their home.

Sunday Morning

Sunday School

Adults

We’ve offered one-month and/or six-week studies over the summer. We are doing two-month blocks the rest of the year. The jury is still out on whether that is a factor in increasing attendance.

Children

All our young children (4 years and older), middle- and high-school kids work on a construction project over the summer, along with any adults who wish to participate. The first year we did the tabernacle, last summer it was Noah’s Ark, and in ’05 we will make a replica of New Jerusalem.

The result:

1) It has brought some children to Sunday school who don’t ordinarily come.

2) It produced a significant bump in attendance.

3) It gave most teachers a two and a half month break.

4) It avoided having just one or two children in a class.

5) It gave us an intergenerational learning activity.

Since our schools begin in mid-August, we start fall activities then. (If you use CE&P curriculum, it’s no problem getting materials for a mid-August start.)

VBS

If you’re struggling, reflect again on your purpose and how you want to achieve it.

Last summer our church’s intern did a Backyard Bible Club in a neighboring county where we are planting a church. There were 204 children who came for one or more of the three days. They heard the gospel. Also several contacts were made for the new congregation.

Your setting might benefit from a one day or evening activity once a week over four to six weeks. Or you might be able to do a day camp running from morning into the afternoon. Years ago I led one in a mission congregation that had no property. We used a public park.

Another option would be a different kind of program, either a substitute for VBS or in addition. For two years we’ve had a Music Arts and Drama Camp. MAD Camp has attracted some who expressed no interest in VBS. The same was true for the Swim Camp we offered last summer. (There’s a pool on our property.)

Don’t do something different just to be different. But don’t be afraid to try something if you believe it will better utilize your resources to achieve your purpose. That means failure is always lurking. And you will fail. We tried a soccer camp two years ago. We had a professional player to lead and we live in a community where the sport is incredibly popular, but it didn’t work.

I’ve often said that much of what I have done hasn’t worked all that well. But the things that have worked make the effort worthwhile.

May God pour out his blessings as you attempt to serve him in the most effective way possible.

What Would Jesus Do?

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bob.jpgWWJD – What would Jesus do? It’s a question that was recycled from a book written over 100 years ago. It became a fad that quickly faded. But what would it mean to take the question seriously?

The evangelical church in the United States has trouble identifying just what kingdom living entails. It’s another way to ask WWJD. Many would suggest we ought to try to win as many people as possible to the exclusion of any other task. An extreme version of this would see secular employment as only a means to the end of evangelism.

Without detracting from the great command to make disciples, there is another command – to subdue the earth. That is to cultivate it. That command has never been abrogated.

For the most part, however, it would appear that we Christians are not unduly exercised about being kingdom disciples. That’s undoubtedly one reason pollsters contend there is little difference between those who claim allegiance to Christ and everybody else. Christians in the United States seem far more attuned to middle class American culture as expressed in their communities than the desires of Jesus.

That’s a stinging indictment. Yet Christians have a propensity to hear such things, perhaps even feel guilty, but have little motivation to do anything differently. In fairness, anything different would be counter-cultural and could have a ripple effect with profound consequences.

For instance, a relatively small minority of Christians advocates a simpler lifestyle. In theory many Christians agree with some aspects of that desire. But consider some of the difficulties:

1. Consumer spending is the engine that keeps the American economy going. If large numbers of people cut way back on spending we would experience a significant economic downturn. Those who produce “stuff” need us. This is despite indications that the more we have the less happy we become.

2. There are expectations that come from our children. When our daughters were little we had a lunch box issue at the beginning of every school year. They had to take their lunch in a lunch box. A paper bag wouldn’t do. But it couldn’t be just any lunch box. There were just a few deemed acceptable by the other kids. And it seemed that most years we bought the wrong one.

3. There are expectations that come from our community. For the most part these are not expressed in words but attitudes. Cell phones have moved from the province of a select few to the mass market. If you don’t have a cell phone (I’m still holding out), it’s obvious you’re out of step.

4. We’ve got our own desires too. I’ve got a car with over 200,000 miles on it. It’s beat up but it runs fine. Yet I find myself watching the new car ads regularly. With all the price competition it’s stirring a desire in me for some new wheels.

Which lunch box a child carries or which car a person drives are not intrinsically moral issues. Yet these decisions shape us.

A few will sacrifice for the sake of Christ. Consider the lady who is giving everything away so that the work of the kingdom can prosper. And the medical doctor who left a thriving practice to work with children who live on the street. The physician who retired early to treat the homeless. The couple that moved into the inner city. They experience poverty as they minister to the impoverished. But these are dramatic illustrations.

Consideration of the kingdom ought to guide us in every endeavor. That consideration is always in danger of being trumped by the quest for success and status. It’s bad enough that such desires detract from the kingdom. On top of that we live in a society where those who have achieved success are held up as models. This is as true in the Christian community as it is elsewhere. A life of sacrifice may be admired but it is seldom imitated. Couple that with our propensity toward evil and kingdom values can easily be suppressed or distorted.

So how do ordinary people like us attempt to influence society with Christian values? Scripture urges us to look after the fatherless and widows (James 1:27). Single moms have been with us for a long time. Micah asked, “What does the Lord require of you?” His answer, “To act justly (treat people fairly) and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God” (Micah 6:8). At times fairness is not enough. To show mercy is to risk being used. This is more than a prescription for an exemplary life. It is what it means to walk with God — what it means to influence society with Christian values.

Suffice it to say that it is in the church that we ought to learn what it means to be messengers of grace wherever we are. It is in this context that we are to make disciples. We have the great privilege of self consciously bringing the influence of God’s kingdom to a society dimly aware of his nature and purposes.

Just so we get it right. More things are caught than taught.