By Dr. Nelson Perret. Familiarity with a subject often leads to a very superficial understanding of reality. So it is with the passion and crucifixion of our Lord Jesus Christ. We all know the story. In fact, we know it so well that the depth of physical suffering Jesus of Nazareth went through is scarce
Men
Easter Train Coming
By Bryan Chapell. Yo-Yos, pet rocks and Reeboks-the fads come and go with dizzying speed as America’s youth undecide, “what’s hot.” But in the simpler times of my own grade school years, there was nothing more “cool” than “stretched nickels.”
The value of a stretched nickel was not determined by how sparingly you spent it but by how flat you squashed it. The thinner the sliver of silver in one’s pocket, the more its owner’s “cool” quotient inflated. As a result some kids stretched nickels by squeezing them in vices, crushing them between rocks or hammering them on driveways. But the coolest kids always had their nickels stretched by trains. They put a nickel on a train track and let a 100-ton locomotive do its work.
Sacrificing a nickel to a train was no small investment to a kid of my day. A nickel amounted to an entire week’s allowance. With a nickel you could get five pieces of Double Bubble, or three jaw breakers, or a slab of gum with two baseball cards. Still, despite the anticipated loss, in the quest for adolescent “cool” I also made my pilgrimage to the local train tracks one Saturday. (Now, I was young and oblivious to the dangers of my actions. So, do not take this account as an endorsement for what I did.)
I stood on the train tracks and looked far down the line. Though it was just a speck on the horizon, I saw a train coming. The smoke of the diesel engine puffed into the air and my hopes soared with it. “I am gonna be so cool,” I gloated inwardly.
I put my nickel on the track and I waited-and waited, and waited: five minutes, ten minutes, thirty minutes. My, that train was coming slowly. The speck never seemed to get larger no matter how many thousand times I checked its progress. If it was moving at all, it was going to take till Christmas to arrive. Though my vision was never quite good enough to tell for sure what was happening, I slowly began to lose confidence that train was coming at all.
As my confidence in the coming of that slow train waned, the longings of my sweet tooth grew. And before I knew it a stretched nickel seemed far less valuable than the sweet savor of Double Bubble and sour-apple jawbreakers. The thought of things more immediately gratifying eventually won out as the train delayed. I picked my unstretched nickel off the tracks, trekked to the local candy shop, and whether that train ever came I cannot say.
But I can tell you of another slow train that did come. It was a train called Death. It brought the sacrifice of our Savior, Jesus Christ, on the Cross. The schedule of that train was marked not by hours and minutes, but by millennia, because the Scriptures say that Jesus is the Lamb that was slain from the creation of the world (Revelation 13:8) Through his prophets God announced this train centuries before it arrived.
Amazing Vision
It is one of the wonders of Easter that God saw that train while it was only a speck on the horizon of history. The prophecies of the Old Testament span many lifetimes to reveal an amazing vision possessed by our heavenly Father. When the slow train of Death that would come to crush the Savior was too far off to be seen by any human eye, Scripture reveals God clearly perceived this train centuries before its arrival in all its gory detail: The hiss of the brake release echoes the gasp of the Son as they put the thorns on his brow; the rattle of rocks in the rail bed, the roll of the dice as they gamble for his garment; the roar of the engine, the clamor of the crowd that cries, “Crucify Him”; the pummel of the tracks, the rhythm of the lash that stripes his back; the driving of a piston, die hammer of the blows that pound the nails; the wail of the whistle, the cry of the Lamb, “Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani”; and, above all billows the cloud of smoke that is the darkness as the Father must turn His back on His own Son. All was foretold. The Father saw this slow train coming while it was still distant down the tracks of history.
The miraculous vision, the prophesies of Christ’s passion reveal, is one of the great comforts of the Easter season. The difficulties of our world, our occupations and our families can seem to wrap us in a darkness so deep we wonder if God is really aware of what we face. In our pain and confusion we cry out, “Doesn’t God see?” Easter proclaims he sees and knows.
Like the headlight of a train piercing the foggiest night, God’s vision penetrates the darkness we face. He sees the problems. He knows the pain. If neither the darkness of evil nor the distance of centuries that enshrouded his Son could cloud his vision, then our darkness does not blind him now.
Amazing Love
But there is another miracle as evident in the Easter prophesies as God’s amazing vision. It is the wonder of an amazing love. The Father saw that slow train that would crush His Son coming down the tracks of time. That is a miracle. But an even greater wonder is that the Father, seeing that slow train coming, left his Son there.
The Father left Jesus on the tracks that Death would travel. Your soul and mine were to be purchased at the cost of this sacrifice. And though the train was slow, nothing distracted God from his purpose. Nothing of greater value called him away from his diving intention. Even the life of his own Son was not more precious than our salvation.
It is an amazing thought, isn’t it? The God who sees so far through history sees as deeply into us. He sees our sins, our failures, our doubts and longings. He sees all that could make us undesirable to him. Yet he deemed nothing more valuable than our souls. Nothing appealed to him more than us. He was not distracted and he did not lift the One infinitely more precious than silver from the tracks on which Death traveled until all was accomplished.
The amazing love of God revealed at Easter further comforts us in our troubled world. For even if we believe that God sees through our darkness, when our world caves in our hearts cry out, “Doesn’t God care?” The heart of God displayed at Easter responds, “How could I care more?”
Look through God’s eyes and see how great is his care for you. There coming down the tracks of time is the slow moving train that will crush life from his Son. It will take only the slightest motion of God’s hand to trip the lever diverting the train down another track. Every parental impulse is to lift the Son from danger and clasp him to the Father’s breast in loving relief. Yet our Heavenly Father sees that if the train crushes not Jesus it will destroy you and me. He looks at us with our sin-stained clothes and angry eyes. He looks once more at the train bearing down upon us, and then his eyes settle on his Son. The decision is made. The gaze will not shift again until the moment of the awful blow.
We are deemed more precious than the Most Precious. The Father gave the Son to save us. “It was the Lord’s will to crush Him” (Isaiah 53:10) that we might live. Nothing was more valuable to the Father than purchasing your soul and mine-not even the life of His Son. What an amazing heart beats in heaven for you and for me! What a wonderful reassurance that heartbeat provides when our fallen world does not make sense and our lives are full of pain. When explanations are not possible we still know God cares. He already purchased us at too high a price not to consider us precious to him now.
The amazing love and vision revealed in biblical prophecies of the Easter events are wonderful encouragements. But there is another wonder the prophecies illumine. It is the amazing purpose in God’s Easter plan. God revealed long ago that he would not allow his Holy One to see decay. (Psalm 16:10) The grave would not own the Son. For this to be true the power of Death itself had to be destroyed. God planned every detail.
When Death struck Jesus the collision not only crushed life from him, it ruptured the engines of the train itself. And the sin that fueled this formerly irresistible force spewed upon the Savior leaving Death powerless to run the rails of time again. It could not even inch beyond the point of impact with our Lord.
When it struck Jesus, Death collided with its own destruction. Jesus rose from the wreck to prove the once mighty train had made its last run on the route heaven claims. From the ruin God purposed a resurrection whose impact reverberates still in our lives. For there are moments of despair and difficulty when it is not enough that God sees or cares. We also question, “Can’t God help?” Easter echoes the answer that God is able.
In Christ’s resurrection God demonstrates he will achieve his good purposes even if the forces of a fallen world seem to travel unhindered for a time. The train whose destination was the Cross proves God’s plan is precise, his actions are sure, and he is never behind his schedule. Even though our circumstances may confuse and trouble us, Easter bells announce the arrival of the train of God’s amazing purpose that cannot be hindered.
The train called Death crushed Jesus. Then Jesus commandeered the train. With his death he conquered Death and gave this train a new name. The train left the station of human history names Death, but it arrives at the destination of God’s purpose as the Death of Death. Now as it travels on through the lives of millions of souls in the largest cities and remotest places Jesus calls to us. He beckons us aboard the train powered by the righteousness no man can match and bound for the destination no man can reach alone.
No force can keep the passengers aboard this train from the purposes God intends for their lives. Their route is perfectly planned. Their arrival is sure because Lord Jesus engineers this train. It may seem to take a while, and sometimes it may seem delayed but the train is coming. Through history it rolls, to heaven it rides. Jesus is at the throttle and neither sin, circumstances, nor Satan himself can stop this train or hinder its riders.
Year after year the Easter train comes. Each time it passes it roars anew Christ’s victory and our hope. Earth’s clamors fade when the Easter train comes. Christ’s victory drowns every echo of doubt and makes faint the loudest fears. When we see his amazing vision, when our hearts perceive his amazing love, when our minds conceive his amazing purposes; confidence grows in our souls, courage resonates in our lives and rejoicing springs from our lips.
Jesus rose from the wreck for me and now he engineers my victory. The Easter train is coming again. My Savior rides it still. Because I see him coming, I face this life with the confident words of the old Negro spiritual as my own victory song: “Ride on King Jesus, no man can hinder me. Ride on, Ride on, King Jesus-Now, no man can hinder me!”
Taking Prayer Requests Seriously
By Frank Barker. People frequently make prayer requests of us. So many, in fact, that we tend not to take them as seriously as we should. I think of some requests I received recently:
…a mother asking that I pray for her wayward son
… a missionary, for the Gospel to penetrate his area
… a minister’s wife, for her discouraged husband
… a grandfather, for his seriously ill Granddaughter
… a wife, for her marriage
When Jesus Made a Prayer Request
Matthew tells us of an occasion when Jesus made a prayer request. At Gethsemane He said to Peter, James and John, “My soul is exceeding sorrowful, even unto death: tarry ye here and watch with me” (Matthew 26:38). R.C. Trench says Jesus uses a remarkable word that points to an unfathomable depth of anguish. Mark’s term is that he was “sore amazed.” He wanted human comfort, companionship. His hand, in the darkness, gropes for the hand of a friend. He asked that they pray for Him.
He then made a request of the Father: “O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me” (vs. 39). What is the cup of which He is speaking? Hugh Martin in his classic, The Shadow of Calvary, writes:
That curse of God, from which he came to redeem his elect people-the penal desertion on the cross-–the withdrawal of all comfortable views and influences-and the present consciousness of the anger of God against him as the surety, substitute … these were the elements mingled in the cup … which was now to be put into his hands: and the prospect caused him deadly sorrow! Christ is disappointed in His disciples’ response.
“And He cometh unto the disciples, and findeth them asleep, and saith unto Peter, What, could ye not watch with me one hour? Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak” (vs. 40-41).
The flesh, human nature, is weak. He was experiencing the weakness of His own human nature and theirs was fallen. He says: “You need to watch and be constantly vigilant against anything that would trip you up. Be vigilant against slothfulness in prayer especially. Watch and pray that ye enter not into temptation!”
A little later they defected! They were sleeping when they should have been praying. Meanwhile He has peace, having been strengthened in answer to prayer.
Prayer for Others is Crucial
From this story we can see that prayer for others is crucial. Jesus requested such prayer for Himself! Paul requested prayer for himself, “brethren, pray for us” (1 Thessalonians 5:25). James tells us to “Pray for one another” (5:16).
God, on occasion, leads in such prayer, laying burdens on our hearts that He would have us pray for and then giving unusual indication of its effectiveness. Oswald Sanders in his book, Prayer Power Unlimited, tells of Mrs. Ed Spahr being awakened at midnight burdened for missionary Jerry Rose in Dutch New Guinea working among stone-age culture people. She prayed and the next morning wrote a letter telling of it. Later it was learned that he received prayer letters from five prayer partners in five continents saying they prayed for him on that specific occasion. When the dateline and time span were adjusted, it was seen that they all prayed at the same time-the very time Jerry was standing with his arms tied behind his back and a “stone-age” savage was standing before him with a spear ready to pin him to the ground.
As five prayer partners on five continents prayed, another man in the tribe (there were no Christians at this time) spoke to the man and he walked away. As we can see, this was, in a sense, God requesting prayer from these five for Jerry Rose.
How Can We Encourage Taking Prayer Requests Seriously?
We can encourage it in others by giving opportunity for making such requests. On Saturday mornings we have a men’s prayer breakfast at our home. We distribute lists of things to pray for, but when we break up into smaller groups we tell the men to share with each other prayer requests. In a group you’ll say: “Bill, what can we pray for you?”
Bill responds,”I lost my job.”
“George, what about you?”
“Praise God! I got that contract you fellows prayed about!” George exclaims.
“Sam?”
Sam says,”My son is on drugs.”
Well, believe me, you pray for each other in such an environment, and you cry for each other, too.
At our early morning prayer meeting at the church, we spend the last fifteen minutes in small groups praying for each other. Some of our Sunday school classes do similarly. Many churches have telephone prayer chains to handle prayer requests.
To encourage yourself to take such prayer requests seriously, try the following. First, if possible, pray with the person right when the request is made whether over the phone or if the person is with you. Second, right then write the request down in your appointment book (I have a section in the back for such requests). Third, have time in your prayer schedule for praying about such things.
Something that has been helpful to me is to arrange my prayer time letting the different days form an acrostic. On Monday M stands for Ministers and Marriages; O for Other Evang
Asking Others to Have Faith When We Didn’t Have
By Kathryn Farris. Isidoro pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and caught the tears that streamed down his face as he received the first copy of the Mixtec New Testament he helped translate. Others who attended this dedication service were also in awe because they were receiving the Scriptures in their own language. Many of them had not believed their language could even be written. They certainly did not expect a work of such magnitude.
Appreciation for their language as a written tool of communication, however, is a relatively new concept for the Mixtecs. When Ed and I and our three children moved to Yosondua in 1969 to learn the Mixtec language, most of the people were curious but they were not anxious to have their language written nor to have books produced. What purpose would it serve? One man summed it up by saying, “Aren’t these people in the United States for you to mock? Why did you have to come here?” Clearly our work was cut out for us if we were to have a ministry among the Mixtecs.
First, we had to understand them and appreciate their culture. We learned they call themselves the Rain People, not Mixtecs, the name the Aztecs gave them when they swept down and conquered the region. These Rain People have a history rich with stories of brave warriors, conquests, extensive trade, expert craftsmanship and advanced agricultural methods. Some of these accounts are recorded in picture-writing (codices) and are preserved to this day. Their ancestors, who worshipped the sun, passed on stories about the creation of the world and other phenomena that occurred on earth.
They traditionally moved in family groupings and maintained only minimal contact with outsiders. In fact, the Yosondua Mixtec language does not have words for friend or neighbor. Those who lived near them and with whom they socialized were relatives, so the word jnahan served for relative, friend and neighbor. In more recent times they borrowed the Spanish words for friend and neighbor and use them today as part of their language and pattern of living.
Today the Yosondua Mixtecs, who live in the state of Oaxaco, number approximately 8,000. While many continue to speak only Mixtec, or the Rain Language, some have become bi-lingual speaking both Mixtec and Spanish. As farmers they raise corn, wheat, beans and several varieties of squash. Many of them practice the art of weaving baskets with intricate designs.
Even though they were conquered by the Spanish, they survived and have emerged as a strong, quiet people who are intensely loyal to their beliefs and traditions. Today, as reserved people, they are slow to accept change and innovative ideas and they cling tenaciously to the traditional values of their culture.
Understanding this, we realized we would probably not see them accept changes during our time with them. We had faith that God’s Word would one day make a difference, but not for a long time. We also wanted to see them with improved farming techniques, a better understanding of hygiene and the ability to read. The mainstream of Mexican life was impinging upon them and we wanted them equipped to adjust to the changes. We asked people to pray for these projects but to especially pray that the Mixtecs would be transformed by God’s Word into his children. Not to the cautious and reserved Mixtecs.
We were wrong! Wrong in our lack of faith and in our “realism.” Change came. For the catalyst, God chose Basilia, who grew up an orphan girl, unable to read or write. Her world consisted primarily of caring for her family and tending to the goats and sheep. Her husband, Isidore, made a commitment to follow Christ while working with Ed on the translation. But instead of growing, he reverted to his old ways and began drinking. Things fell apart for the family. Finances were so bad he decided to try his luck in Baja, California. There was no gold at the end of the rainbow in Baja and he began the trip back home dejected. While he was gone, some men came to Yosondua with a film on the life of Christ. Townspeople directed them to Basilia since her husband had once identified himself as a believer.
The idea of seeing a film intrigued Basilia, and she invited her neighbors to join her. That evening her one-room log house was full. The film was novelty but the message a powerful force. It challenged them as nothing else had ever done and they determined to learn more.
Isidoro returned to a wife who was different and neighbors who showed an interest in the message they had laughed at earlier. His surprise became boundless when they asked him to teach them the Bible. He had helped with the translation of the New Testament and he surely must know a great deal, they reasoned. He could barely fathom all that was unfolding. One thing he knew, he was a failure. He had not stood firm in the truth. That night God changed Isidoro’s heart, and our dreams began to materialize.
From that nucleus of believers a church of over 200 people emerged. They have dared to step out of the cultural mold to reach neighbors, friends and acquaintances with the message of salvation. And how their lives have changed. Men who had once been enemies now work side by side. Drunkards are sober. Sick children are well. Women are treated with new respect. Men take their work for the school or town seriously. Land that lay neglected is tended and produces a harvest. People prosper and live in peace. Such changes for the Rain People. An impossible dream come true! Thank you for praying.
Adoption–Not Abortion: Exciting Vision-Tough Realities
By Frederick T. Marsh. Approaching the temple gate called Beautiful, Peter and John came upon a man, lame from birth. He knew what he needed: a handout. Peter and John knew better. If they gave the man alms, they would, in the words of one author, “be confirming his lameness.” A temporary need would be met, but the message to the man would be clear: “You are lame. You are not capable of doing anything that will contribute to your support.” Peter and John had a far superior alternative: the healing power of Jesus.
About fifteen years ago, leading voices in society were telling us they could give us alms when it came to addressing crisis pregnancy needs. These voices argued that abortion would solve a lot of societal problems. Many were swayed to that way of thinking-perhaps the problem population of society could be reduced by abortion and the rest of us would be better off.
Today, the trends in society give ample evidence to the faultiness of this thinking. Abortion has not solved problems. It has not even proved itself to be the handout that would confirm lameness. Excepting the Webster Supreme Court decision, all societal trends related to fornication, adultery and crisis pregnancy are measurably more negative. Even the voices who once spoke for societal convenience now largely argue the personal convenience of abortion.
Consider a few statistics. Abortion now claims the lives of more than 1.5 million unborn children every year. Of those who survive to birth, very close to 30 percent are born to mothers who are not married. Well over a majority of these grow up in homes that depend on public assistance for survival.
Twenty years ago 90 percent of children born out of wedlock went into adoptive homes. Today that figure has spiraled downward to less than 5 percent. The combined impact on adoption of abortion and single parenting is evident in figures summarized by the National Committee for Adoption: “Unrelated domestic adoptions have fluctuated tremendously over the past three decades from 33,800 in 1951 to a peak of 89,200 in 1970, declining to 50,720 in 1982 and now 51,157.”
The implications are staggering-whole succeeding generations of persons raised in financial poverty, most often accompanied by poverty of mind and spirit. Think of entire generations in which there are no positive male role models, in which as many as one-third of our nation’s children do not even know who their fathers are. Think of whole generations who knew no time when the practice of abortion was not the common practice of their society. Today’s teenagers, even twenty-year olds, have never known a time when they understood human reproduction without also knowing abortion as common practice.
Spend a little time in a crisis pregnancy center or with an adoption agency pregnancy counselor. You will see another dimension of the problem emerging very quickly: numbers are simple compared to the massive confusion of the personal lives of those represented by the numbers. Almost gone are situations in which a young woman from a stable Christian family finds herself pregnant because she and her steady boyfriend were “in love” and got too intimately involved. Instead birthmothers say very little about the Lord, about love, guilt or morality.
The challenge is great because it is all-pervasive. It’s literally right next door, with today’s trends setting an ever more destructive pattern for years to come. Where is the Lord in the midst of all this, and what does He say to His people? How is the healing power of the Gospel applied, addressing real needs without confirming the lameness?
Thankfully, alternative ministries to abortion are a growing movement in the Presbyterian and reformed communities. But some common misconceptions must be addressed. One is that stopping an abortion is enough, and we need not be greatly concerned with what happens after that. A leading secular women’s journal recently observed that evangelicals were saving babies from abortion only to place them on the welfare rolls. There is validity to that criticism. Another misconception is that parenting is automatically the preferred alternative since the woman is responsible for her actions. Therefore, the most biblical alternative is that she parent her child.
Attitudes toward adoption have fallen on hard times. In today’s pragmatic atmosphere, most women will be dissuaded from having an abortion much more by the availability of support in choosing another alternative than by even the most persuasive of moral arguments. The testimony of young women who make adoption plans repeatedly includes the observation in retrospect that they would have chosen abortion had this alternative not been available to them.
Among many Christians who are convinced that the practice of abortion is in all cases wrong, confusion reigns in the variety of viewpoints. What is appropriate for the person once she has decided that she will carry her child to term? Some are satisfied to confirm her lameness, putting her on the welfare rolls and considering the job done because the life has been spared. Others realize the inadequacy of this, but look realistically at limited resources for ministry and make a determination that the priority should be on sparing the life even if the quality that follows may be lacking.
What can we do collectively as the Lord’s people? A great beginning has been made through crisis pregnancy centers, adoption agencies and maternity homes. These need to grow. We need a constant study of the issues from a biblical perspective. We need a study of the trends, and communication of the needs to the Lord’s people. The Lord’s people must work toward greater availability of long-term alternatives to abortion. Birthparents ought not to have to consider going on welfare roles, but helped bear parental responsibly, or make an adoption plan. They must be adequately supported and directed as they move in one of these directions.
The cost of doing good is high. Whether it be to provide space and some administrative coordination to a ministry staffed largely by volunteers, or whether it be to support a professional staff with appropriate credentials for service. The cost is great. Crisis pregnancy centers, adoption agencies, maternity homes-all fulfill their essential roles in service to persons in need. All must be supported.The preceding list mentions only short-term remedial services to the already pregnant. Add to that effective educational serves that encourage abstinence, effective legal campaigns to bring changes in the law with regard to protection of life and genuine long-term rehabilitative services that would offer a young man or woman a genuine new start in life through training or education following a pregnancy. We have quite a challenge!
A popular poster asks the question, “How do you feed two billion hungry people?” The answer: “One at a time.” We are called to be humble stewards of the finite resources God places in our hands. The efforts of one or two individuals may not seem great, but particular lives are changed. And testimony is given to the world that the Spirit of God brings rebirth. Individuals by organized effort can minister to individuals, changing lives, one by one, through the power of the Gospel.
Bethany Responds to Webster
Although the implications are still unclear, the U.S. Supreme Court’s actions on the Missouri case this past summer have been welcomed by the pro-life community. From our initial reading of the decision., Roe v. Wade is poised for a major overhaul in the next few years. By upholding many elements of the Webster case, the Supreme Court has set the stage for states to begin proposing legislation that will provide similar and differing restrictions.
Bethany will begin examining state legislative actions in various states across the country and decide where we need more offices so that we can be readily available to either begin or expand the vital services that we offer to individuals and families.
While medical, philosophical and religious debates continue discussing when an embryo becomes fully human, and others battle over the “rights” of the mother versus those of the fetus, we at Bethany continue to minister to pregnant women who seek counsel and help.
We uphold the sanctity of life, but we are also deeply concerned about the quality of life. Each day we are confronted with the tragic results of children who are abused and neglected, many of them born to young parents incapable of providing basic care.
Bethany’s quality counseling and support are the factors that have made us the social service arm of the pro-family movement. With the current trend, thousands of women and men may begin seeking pregnancy counseling and exploring adoption as an option. This is our service and we must demonstrate our availability and accessibility. Remember, it’s one thing to talk the talk… another to walk the walk. Keep the sanctity of life in your prayers so that all children, born and unborn, can experience the quality of life.
The Gift of Giving
By Calvin Miller. The wise men started it all, some say. Still, I like the way the Magi gave their gifts, for they presumably returned “to the East” without expecting Mary and Joseph to give them anything in return. Their gifts were meant for the baby Jesus, but there seemed to be no baby shower obligation in their giving. We never read that Luke wrote down the value of their gifts or entered them in the log of people to be thanked later. And we never hear that the kings were back home, feeling bad that no one ever came “from the West” to bring them presents.
Gifts are more blessed to give than to get, says the cliche’. But gifts are seldom given so freely that they don’t result in some bondage. Often at Christmas, gifts become a subtle power play, resulting in obligation. Such gifts may subtly say, “While my gift appears free, repay me in kind,” or “Enjoy this, Joe, but you owe me one now.”
A simple gift from a neighbor may say, “Just remember my generosity the next time I need to borrow you lawn mower.” The milkman’s gift may say, “I really need to keep your business, so don’t buy any eggnog from the Borden’s man this year . . . even though ours costs just a tad more.”
There are, in essence, only three kinds of gifts that one can give at Christmas: the gift-for-gift, the tit-for-tat gift and the genuine grace gift.
Gift-for-Gift
A gift-for-gift present is one that’s carefully measured against what the giver expects to receive in return. A gift-for-gift giver always keeps mental track: Now let’s see. The gift I’m giving cost me $13.95. I wonder what I’llget in return? This approach feeds cash registers all through December. It prompts the last-minute, Christmas Eve dash to the store to be sure some unexpected gift gets repaid in full. This syndrome also generates all those late Christmas cards. Some remote acquaintance surprises us on December 23 with a card that we can’t possible respond to until after Christmas.
Tit-for-Tat
The tit-for-tat gift isn’t motivated by a desire to receive a material gift in return. But the giver expects his present to smooth out some of the bumps of life. Such givers operate primarily in the arena of favors and obligation. At Christmas, bosses often lavish employees with gifts: liquor or expensive cheese-and-fruit wheels. They certainly don’t expect their employees to repay in kind, but they do expect less back talk in the office, at least through March. Their gift says, “Don’t forget what I did for you in December, Buddy-Boy!”
Grace Gifts
The best gift to give or receive is what I call the grace gift. I’ve picked this name because these gifts remind me of the lavish ways that I have received the love of God. Biblical grace, by definition, is a gift so immense, it is unrepayable. When you give or receive a grace gift, you are suddenly in the presence of something too immense to be repaid.
When he was only ten, my son Timothy knew my penchant for collecting Don Quixotes of every size and shape. He and his eleven-year-old sister were shopping when they found a huge unpainted Don Quixote in a plaster shop at an amazingly affordable price. He bought it and lugged it all through the mall.
He wrapped it as well as he could and put it under the tree. In a separate little package, he wrapped the paint and brushes. On Christmas morning, he opened the package and gave it to me. I was delighted. For the next two or three days, Timothy painted the monstrous statuette of Don Quixote charging into life astride his cart-horse steed. As long as I live, I will never forget that wondrous Christmas morning. His art project still stands on our hearth.
The uniqueness of his gift-and all grace gifts-indicates that the giver knows you very well and has put much thought and heart into the giving. You know when you are giving a grace gift, because your heart is saying, “Here I meet you at the place I know you best. You yourself are your gift to me. Nothing else is needed.”
Giving With Grace
Let me suggest two ways to give a grace gift.
First, be sure it’s impossible to measure the cost of your gift. My daughter’s Italian mother-in-law has taught her to cook authentic Italian foods. So when my daughter wants to please me most, she fills a bowl with meatballs swimming in her marvelous marinara sauce, and I am content through long winters. When the snow flies, one of her warm Italian sausage sandwiches says, “Dad, you are so special to me.”
Her love produces warm grace gifts from her pantry to which I could never attach a price tag. I know it cost her something to make these dishes, but their real value is the way they show she loves and understands me.
Second, realize that non-material gifts are the best way to say, “Don’t try to pay me back.” There are three types of non-material gifts.
One is what I like to call the koinonia or “togetherness” gift. Four years ago, my son was in the Green Berets and didn’t have the money to come home for Christmas. My wife and I could scrape together his air fare only if we didn’t buy each other material gifts. In the end, we decided our son’s airplane ticket was the grandest gift we could give. His fellowship was our present to each other.
Second is the leitourgia or “service” gift.
One of our young pastors who has a large family wanted to give us a Christmas gift. While we were away, he came to our house and spent several hours polishing all our shoes. December is a busy month and shoes get scruffy from lack of attention. He had given us real “foot-washing” kind of gift.
The third and most wondrous grace gift falls under the category of “spiritual gifts.”
One friend promised to pray for me all through the Christmas season. Another friend who knows I am fond of Shakespeare gave me a book of Shakespearean quotes from his personal library. Still another friend loaned me his favorite Christmas record for two weeks.
All of these gifts came with the assurance that Christ had prompted the gift and that it was given through Christ on the basis of our friendship. It was marvelous to see the Savior so involved in gifts that were not purchased, but given in the highest name of friendship.
I have most enjoyed giving spiritual gifts at Christmas. One of our older church members is like a mother to me. I could give her a material gift, or I could give her what she really enjoys. I take her to dinner, then we go back to her apartment and sit and talk and share in Scripture and prayer. No ribbons are taken from any package, but it is the greatest gift I could give her.
Just the other day, my daughter said, “Dad, let’s not give each other presents this year, Let’s just eat together as often as we can throughout December. I want to make December the month of our togetherness and the season when we hold the treasure of each other and not mere material things.”
I knew what she meant. So we are committed this year. These December days will be grace gifts. They cannot be paid back, for they are one-time offerings from four people who understand and need one another.
Did the wise men’s lavish gifts expect repayment? I think not. They gave and left Bethlehem with a glow in their hearts. Mary and Joseph understood: The gift was theirs. I cannot say what was in the hearts of the Magi as they made their way back across the desert, but I think their sentiment must have been what Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians 9:15: “Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift!”